S T O P…

My head is whirling.

There is so much in our lives – in MY life.

I have started a new project at work along with a good friend of mine.  We are out to change the world – or at least our little corner of it.

I add this project to the dozens of others that I already feel that I am not fully completing as I’d like.  Of course, my standards for myself are typically higher than those anyone else sets for me.

I’m applying for a new job.  A management position within my agency has opened up.  I’m excited.  I’m terrified.  I’ve worked hard to have this chance.  I have mixed emotions about the possibility of moving out of direct services.  I’m thrilled at the prospect of having a say behind the scenes.

The meeting at Eli’s school regarding his possible eligibility for special education services is coming up in a couple of weeks.

I am planning to take my boys to Minnesota and Iowa over spring break to visit family.  I fear that it will cost me my left kidney to drive there and back.

I love that Keegan is having a birthday party away from my home.  I have NO planning on my part.  I’m making cupcakes and a small cake for the occasion.  Everything else will be put together by the people I’m paying.  So worth the $$$.

Eli has another birthday party to go to this weekend.  I’m excited for him and I know he’ll have a good time but I’m working myself up for the anxiety that will cause the behaviors for the many hours before the event.

I’m excited to be having dinner with friends this weekend AND next!  And I must add that I’m excited that my boys get to join in this dinner.  It’s so great to have fantastic friends with fantastic kids that my boys love to play with.

We welcomed two new family members this past weekend in the form of little fish won at the Mardi Gras carnival.  I’m saddened to report that at least one of those members has already left us.  I fear that the other will have also met his demise when I check on him after writing this post.  If anyone needs to find me on Wednesday after work I’ll be at the pet store buying us up some more family members.

Keegan has not been sleeping.  For several weeks now has not been sleeping.  He starts waking around midnight and then every 1-2 hours after that.  He doesn’t stay awake but I must get out of bed to put him back in bed and tuck him in.  It screws up a girl’s sleep pattern and makes for really tired days.  I’m gonna try putting a pillow of mine in his bed tonight.  It used to work.  Maybe it will again…

With all of this – good and crazy – I’m feeling the need to jump off the merry-go-round.  Somebody told me to hold on tight and then spun the damn thing so fast that they, themselves, were thrown halfway across the park when it was time to let go.  I keep trying to jump off so that I can stop for just a moment.  I’m insanely dizzy.

So, please bear with me.  My own version of cuckoo may just pop out now and again here.  Fortunately, I know a few of you are holding onto a little of your own crazy.  That’s why I love ya so!

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About Brotherly Love

I am a mom, partner, teacher and a lover of life. I have two fabulous boys who define my life as I know it. One of my children has been diagnosed with a sensory processing disorder, Asperger's and anxiety disorder. I blog as much about him as I do about my life and the lives of my immediate family.
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5 Responses to S T O P…

  1. Kate says:

    That is a LOT! Good luck with the new project, the new job, the travels, the sleep, the parties, the fun, the anxiety…
    My baby is waking too, and it is so so tough. I miss my brain.

  2. Debbi Henry says:

    Just reading this made my head spin! Good luck with getting everything done, and try to find time for some down time! You’ll be glad you did!

  3. akbutler says:

    have my own area of crazy here so I know what you mean. hang on and get some downtime when you can!

  4. Elastamom says:

    Good for you for applying for that job—you are awesome!! We are so looking forward to dinner this weekend too!!! And Matty is super excited to go bowling for K’s party!

  5. Pingback: Click… Click… Click… | Brotherly Love

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