How do we get here?
How do we get to that place where you can’t stop yelling, you can’t stop moving, you can’t calm down?
You’ve gone so many days with nothing.
So many days where you have self-control, where you’re a joy to be around.
I love you so, and you’re my little boy no matter what.
But this weekend you were a struggle.
You tested my patience with your constant verbal stimming.
You tired me out with your constant need to move.
You had me cringing every time you moved for fear that you would break something or hurt yourself with your inability to focus.
You keep me wondering what brings on this change.
Is it the weather? Is it the numbers of activities you do in a week? Are you not sleeping well again? Is it another growth spurt?
It’s so very hard to watch you struggle to control your entire person.
I hate when you cry the crocodile tears over everything that happens because your emotions are out of control, like everything else.
I take solace in the fact that at times like these you need my hugs. That my hugs actually comfort you.
Because, unfortunately, little man my hugs are all I have.