To Have and To Hold

From the time they were born I’ve held my babies.  I’ve rocked them, I’ve sung to them.  My boys didn’t fall asleep on their own until they were more than a year old because I wanted to hold them, rock them, sing to them while they fell asleep.  I’m a working mother and take every moment that I can with my children.  So, I ignored all of those crazy, don’t hold your kids all the time, idiots when they tried to tell me that my kids would NEVER fall asleep on their own because of what I was doing.  Well, I’m happy to report that they not only fall asleep on their own, but we bonded so much during that first year!

But, my children grew, like all children grow.  It became increasingly harder to rock them at night.  I would still rock in their rooms and sing them to sleep.  Soon, though, they started asking for music from their CD players instead of my singing.  Keegan still wanted me to “dance” him to sleep, but he recently got too big for me to do that anymore too.

Still, those rare occasions arise when they need their mommy.  They need to be held, to be rocked, to be sung to.  They need me to get them to sleep.  Tonight was one of those occasions. 

Keegan was extremely tired – almost overtired – and he is still recovering from his ear infection.  We crawled into his bed to read a story and he snuggled in with all of his bedtime “friends”.  One of those friends has a sound device in it’s belly that makes the critter chatter when you squeeze it.  Keegan loves that chatter so much.  Today, the chatter box died.  Keegan was instantly heartbroken.  He cried and cried and cried some more.  Then he was so tired that he couldn’t calm himself back down.  I asked if he wanted to rock and he nodded and walked into my bedroom to the rocking chair.

It took a few minutes to calm him down.  But, I rocked him, I sang to him and I stroked his head.  All of the things I did when he was a baby.  I held him close and soaked in every minute.  He eventually fell asleep and then briefly woke up to ask me to put him into bed because he couldn’t stretch out in my arms.  I reluctantly put him into bed, told him I loved him and kissed him goodnight.  He grinned with his eyes closed and said “I love you too mommy”. 

Some days it just doesn’t get any better…


About Brotherly Love

I am a mom, partner, teacher and a lover of life. I have two fabulous boys who define my life as I know it. One of my children has been diagnosed with a sensory processing disorder, Asperger's and anxiety disorder. I blog as much about him as I do about my life and the lives of my immediate family.
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3 Responses to To Have and To Hold

  1. The Henrys says:

    Ahh, a nice story!I still rock Gracie to sleep and she is 8 years old. She has never liked going to sleep so that is what has always worked for her. Sometimes, she will be so tired and will just lay down on her bed and go to sleep. I like rocking her though. It is like our special time of the day.I also rocked Caleb to sleep for at least his first year.There is just something about holding our babies at the end of the day, all snuggly and loving!

  2. Beth says:

    So sweet! I love holding my babies too, but they are getting so big – 11 and 5. We still all climb in the big bed for family snuggles. Hopefully we always will. 🙂

  3. Lovely post… I love hugs at nighttime and at morning time. 🙂 sometimes putting a fan on in the room helps my son de-stress and sleep!

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